I do hereby resolve to remain resolute in my decision to not make any resolutions for the new year. There, I said it, and I meant it. I will not make a list, a plan, or an agenda. There will be no repentance for the things I did or did not do in 2015. There will be no judgments over the goals I did not complete during the past year. There will be only an open mind and an open heart as the sun descends on one year and arises upon another.
No, I will not vow to give up this thing, that thing, or any thing. The only thing I will get rid of is the negative self-talk that leads me to believe there is something(s) wrong with me that requires me to have to give things up, or that something(s) need fixing. Other than that one thing I will be a keeper of things, even a gatherer of things. Only these things won’t be actual physical things, rather they will take shape in experiences, moments, and memories.
I will draw these intangibles close and hold them tight. I will live in each moment, I will feel deeply each experience, and I will savor every memory. I will breathe in and fill up my lungs with the events of my days as though they are the oxygen that keeps me alive. For they are…in their own way they are.
I will gather in and embrace the people who make the moments memorable. I will continue breaking down the walls of privacy I have been kicking furiously at for the past few years. I will do my best to eliminate the last tenuous hold I have on my personal space barriers. I will answer the knock of strangers upon the door to my life, and I will welcome them across the threshold with a “thank you for coming” and a hug. I will find ways every day to let the friends and family who make me whole know how much they are valued.
No, I will not set up any timetables or schedules for the coming year. The word deadline is not welcome here. Come to think of it, neither is the word goal. Let’s throw out objective, aim, and target while we’re at it.
This year I will gift myself with the freedom of being goalless. I shall recognize and accept that what I am happy doing today may not make me happy tomorrow. I reserve the right to change my mind, and my direction, on at least 365 days next year. My success with be measured only by my joy.
No, I will not have a plan. I will invite my old nemesis spontaneity to the party. I may even tell him to bring his buddy, my arch rival, impulse along for the ride. Watch me step off of the path that has been so carefully trodden for years. See how I spread my arms wide and step out onto the tightrope, welcoming adventure with a smile. Don’t be too surprised to see me running in the rain with joyous laughter trailing behind me. I will daily remember and acknowledge that all of my very best moments have followed the precious seconds when I dropped my guard, my need for a plan for everything, and simply allowed life to be.
My life will not be stifled by the vision of what I or anyone else imagines it should be. It will not follow a cookie cutter blueprint of what a life should look like. It will be what I, along with a good bit of help from karma and fate, choose to make it. It will be my unique, messy, silly, beautiful, happy life.
Yes, I will remain resolute in my resolve concerning New Year’s resolutions. Or will I?
Thank you for joining me and being a part of my journey in 2015. You are the people that I speak of who make the moments memorable. I wish you all the freedom to love yourself in 2016 and beyond. Cheers! Karen
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