Please Do Not Be This Person


People watching is one of my favorite pastimes.  It is interesting to observe human behavior, especially when the subjects are not aware they are “under surveillance”.  How a person treats others is a good indicator of his true character.  There are people out there who make great role models, and then there are certain types you do not want to emulate.  In short, these are the people you do not want to act like.

Do not be the person people feel compelled to apologize after.  It is not fun to trail behind you mouthing, “I’m so sorry!” to waitstaff and retail personnel after you have sliced them open with your criticisms and complaints.  Do not be a human wrecking ball, leaving a pile of hurt feelings in your wake.  If you have trouble with this, try counting to ten in between the time a thought enters your brain and the time you allow it to leave your mouth.

Do not be the person who wants to argue with everyone, about everything, all the time.  We all know what they say about opinions, right?  Seriously, though, be aware of when people are open to a good debate and when it is not the right time to push forward.  If you cannot express your opinion without belittling the views of others then do everyone a favor and keep it to yourself.  Do not be argumentative just to draw attention to yourself as it accomplishes nothing more that to make you look small and petty.

Do not be the “I have a better way” person.  Being helpful and offering suggestions with good intentions is great.  It gets old in a hurry, though, when you have a critique or advice for every situation.  Your friend, family member, or co-worker may not always need (or more importantly want) your input on how they parent, where they eat, or which detergent they should use to do laundry.  Go about doing things your way, and let them go about doing things their way.  Trust me, if they want your recommendations they will ask for them.

Do not be the person who needs to “one up” everyone else.  If someone is excited to have just purchased a new grill maybe you do not need to point out that you have two grills, a smoker, and a complete outdoor kitchen.  When one mentions that her daughter is graduating from junior college in a few weeks do not take that as an opening to list the accomplishments of your child all the way from birth through her recent potentially lifesaving discovery of a new strain of salmonella.  This does not mean you should not be proud of what you have or what you do.  It means do not cross over into the land of braggarts and show-offs.  Oh, and be careful, because if you are this guy then chances are you are also the “I have a better way” guy, too.  This is a powerful combo that is known to drive people away in a hurry.

Do not be the person who whines.  I repeat, do not be the person who whines.  It was not attractive when you were a toddler.  I promise you it is even less attractive now.  Temper tantrums are not cute in children, and children are way cuter than grownups.  Plus, if you are not willing to go full throttle, throwing yourself on the ground, kicking, spitting, and screaming with arms flailing, then you are giving it a half-assed effort anyway.  We all complain now and again, and we have all been known to grouse and gripe when things are not going our way.  While this is acceptable, emitting feeble, petulant cries about how wounded, put out, or helpless you are is not.  Please take my word for it that doing so does not win you any fans, nor does it make people want to rush to assist you.

Do you agree with this list?  What type of person would you add?  Would you say do not be the person who tells people what kind of person not to be?  (I won’t mind, I can take it!)  As always I welcome your comments and feedback!  Cheers! Karen

 

Photo credit:  www.pixabay.com

Advertisements

53 thoughts on “Please Do Not Be This Person

  1. What a great list Karen. I agree with every single one. I would add, do not be that person who judges. One often doesn’t know the journey someone else has been on, passing judgement on things we know nothing about.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. We like to people watch too. When walking the dog some school mornings, I’m passed by a mother and her daughter (she’s about 10) and they always seem to have had an argument as Mum is marching some 12 paces ahead and the daughter has a face that would sour milk!

    Liked by 1 person

    • It must be an ongoing battle! Thinking back to the smart mouth and attitude I had as a preteen it isn’t too hard to imagine… The funny thing is that chances are that little girl’s mother will be her best friend someday!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. People watching is one of my favorite pastimes. It is interesting to observe human behavior, especially when the subjects are not aware they are “under surveillance”.

    And here I thought I was the only one. I do that too, lay back, observe people and try to deduce as to why they acted in a certain way. And of course I agree with every point above.
    Great post! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • You are not alone! I could sit in a park or at the mall for hours just watching people interact. I think that by being willing to sit back and observe we are actually better able to digest and respond in a calmer matter at times, rather than diving into the fray or pre-judging people.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Wonderful post Karen, I love to people watch too, and think you have got it spot-on with your list.. One that I have though of as well is Do not play the fool constantly. You know the practical joker, always doing silly things and butting in with ‘funny comments’ that are anything but! Now I love a laugh but this kind of person drives everyone mad!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Ugh, I dated an “I have a better way” one when I was in my early 20s and didn’t know better. I ended up with such a complex I felt like I couldn’t tie my shoes right! Luckily I married his polar opposite!

      So, did you find the Barbie camper?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Ah, you have similar experiences to me with the “I have a better way” kind! I’m glad things are different now!
        PS: There was too much stuff to look through at my parents but the camper in one of the boxes down there…I’ll reach it one day soon!

        Like

  5. Hard to disagree with any of these.
    For me though it is the Knower not the Learner.
    Someone who always Knows and tells you so. It’s so much better to be a Learner, listening rather than always telling.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Love to people watch myself. I find it to be great entertainment. For me, I would add, do not be the person who thinks you’re better than everyone else, or better than the person who is serving you in a restaurant. A big pet peeve of mine are those who feel superior for some reason I’ve never been able to understand.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Great list! Glad you got the “one up” kind of person. My sons tries to be that kind and I have reign him back in. My wife and enjoy people watching. Airports, malls and fairs are great places for this.

    Liked by 1 person

    • At least your son has the excuse of being a kid. I don’t understand grown people who feel compelled to do it at all.
      Airports are interesting spots and high on the people watching list- they truly bring out the best and the worst in people.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Please do not be the person who fails to comment on wonderful posts like this one (!) Seriously, I agree with all of your ‘Please do nots’. Especially after spending Memorial Day Weekend with much-loved, but high-maintenance houseguests!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I don’t know if the true offenders (because I believe most of us slip up now and again) would even be able to see themselves in the descriptions. I do know a number of people guilty of these offenses. Most of the time, I humor them, but I am cringing on the inside.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I love this! I have to deal with truck drivers on a daily basis so the whining I can FULLY appreciate. I hate assholes that have to “one up” everyone also. Get a grip just be happy for that person and shut the hell up!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Karen, You did a good job compiling this list. I think it all comes down to being self-aware and aware of others at the same time. The worst ones are the toppers. Everything you bring up, they have one better. They’re not even interested in what you have to say, except as a jumping off point for their own self-aggrandizement. I know a few like that and avoid them.

    Like

    • Oh yes, I know a few of the toppers, too. It is so frustrating when you are halfway through a story and you realize the person isn’t even listening because they are too busy thinking of what they are going to say! ARGH!

      Like

    • Funny you should mention that, as I am currently reaching my breaking point with a friend who does that! She makes plans with me, only to break them if a “better offer” comes along. Then I end up finding out about it because she posts pictures on Facebook. I’m like, hello….I see you! Grrrrr…….

      Like

    • It is awesome to have a conversation with a group of people who may disagree but do so in a respectful and calm manner. If you can do that, you are open to learning something. Unfortunately it’s more frequent that you come across those whose views are set in stone.

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s